Pre-Marriage and Marriage

For dating and pre marriage, it’s important to have discussions about finances. Women are often more reluctant to address details of finances that feel more business centered rather than love centered. Sometimes it can feel awkward to discuss financial topics, but I plan to be open and honest with my future partner. I want to engage in premarital counseling to be fully prepared for marriage and all that comes with it. It also is wise to be fully aware of your future spouse's credit habits, spending habits, debt, assets, and credit history before marrying. This helps with no surprises and a fully transparent mindset in finances. In order to be fully prepared to tie my finances with another person, I want to know everything; the good and the bad. Getting money, assets, and resources out in the open is vital to financial success as a married couple. One great resource to use for valuable information on healthy marriages including more than just financial advice is the The Alabama Health Marriage Handbook. This is a handbook I plan to use to guide me through the premarital and married stages of my life. I plan to discuss financial goals, compare credit habits and reports before marriage with my future spouse to ensure our finances are starting on the right track. Having pre and post nuptial arrangements in place may be slightly awkward to talk about, but can be valuable in the event of a divorce. This also can ensure children within the marriage are protected. I plan to discuss implementing these. 

When married, there are a lot of new financial hurdles to jump over. However, there is no need to fear taking initiative, your relationship and finances will be stronger if you take the first step. It’s important to talk about money early on and learn how to make compromises. Communication and compromise are key when wanting a financially happy and stable marriage. First, I plan to make sure to name my spouse as a beneficiary on all important forms like 401K plans, IRA’s, insurance, etc. I then plan to research what should be joint accounts and what is financially better off alone. I learned not to merge student loans with my spouse’s. It’s important to be honest with financial statements, including debt, retirement accounts, credit score and balance, average spending and assets. However, merging student debt will worsen it, not aid it. I must then decide what me and my spouse think is best- do we want some accounts separate or everything joint? Again, communication and compromise are key in finding a good balance that leaves both parties happy. We also will have to consider what tax filing will benefit us the most and consult help as needed. This also applies to debt; it’s beneficial to seek help if needed so it doesn’t worsen. It’s vital we create a budget, even if it’s rough, for a game plan for the next year with our new joint expenses and income. We will start by creating goals, short term and long term, we wish to accomplish. We also will put together a consolidated net worth statement to see all assets, liabilities, and debts. I want to set a 10% of assets maximum to control risks and impulsive investing. This percentage ensures we don’t risk too much money. My future spouse and I will find an amount we agree on to consult each other on purchases over that amount. For instance, we have to discuss purchases over $500 if that is the sum we agree upon. Along with that, we should accommodate a slush fund into our budget to spend as we wish. I plan to have us take turns managing the checkbook so both of us know how to keep the books and are up to date on our current finances. We also will schedule a yearly date to review debt reduction plans, net worth, giving plans, and spending. This can keep us aligned with our short term and long term goals. I plan to have us set aside a specific amount of time, talent, and money towards supporting our philanthropic goals. We also will need to decide how children will factor into finances. With costs for children skyrocketing, it’s important to decide how to handle major expenses. However, there is another section that addresses the financial tactics I plan to implement when kids are in the picture. All in all, marriage is a wonderful thing that can be very beneficial financially; as long as we plan early! 

Here are a handful of goals/tactics I have for the Pre-Married and Sustaining a Healthy Marriage phases of my life:

 

• Be open and honest with my future partner BEFORE marrying about finances. 

• Create a budget that is realistic with new expenses and income. 

• Take the first step in taking initiative to speak about finances. 

• Regularly use communication and compromise. 

• Engage in premarital counseling to prepare for the married life. 

• Write down short term and long term goals with spouse to see if we are on track towards achieving them. 

• Have our budget account for a “slush” fund to spend as wanted. 

• Take turns managing the checkbook so both partners know how to keep the books. 

• Set a 10% of assets maximum to control risks and impulsive investing. 

• Seek help with debt if needed. 

• Consider what tax filing will benefit us the most. Consult help as needed. 

• Name spouse as a beneficiary on all important forms like 401K plans, IRA’s, insurance, etc. 

• Research what should be joint and what is more financially better off alone. 

• Schedule a yearly date to review debt reduction plans, net worth, giving plans, and spending. 

• Set aside a specific amount of time, talent, and money towards supporting our philanthropic goals. 

• Discuss financial goals, compare credit habits and reports before marriage. 

• Consult each other on purchases over $500. 

• Put together a consolidated net worth statement to see all assets, liabilities, and debts.

• Decide what my spouse and I think is best- do we want some accounts separate or everything joint? 

• Have pre and post nuptial arrangements in place. 

• Decide how children will factor into finances.